Fantasy Fest 2010: The Parade

It is “the big event” every year at Fantasy Fest. Yes, I am talking about the parade. For me it is the big disappointment of Fantasy Fest. Why? Well, for one thing, I am not a big fan of standing around waiting for stuff to happen, which is what goes on when there are thousands of people loitering on the street waiting for the floats to start. Once said floats do start meandering up the street, there is way too much time between each one, meaning I am stuck looking at all of the naked people coming dangerously close to touching me. Yuck. This year, however, we were invited to a party at the Wyland Gallery. The gallery puts on a Fantasy Fest party every year and most of the tickets are given out to VIP customers. Fortunately they reserve a few for moochers – um, future potential customers – like me. There are so many great things about this party, I urge you to buy some art and get an invite next year. First of all, they have all of the requisite food and drink – it is a party, after all. In my world all parties revolve around the food and drink. Well, OK, not just the parties, pretty much my very existence revolves around food and drink.

The truly fabulous part of the whole event is that not only do they have prime parade viewing (in a roped-off-from-the-masses area) in the 600 block of Duval, but they also have both air conditioning and a clean bathroom. So, what’s the big deal about a clean bathroom? On Friday night I had to beg a perfect stranger to let me into her house to use the bathroom. She did, but it was a bit absurd nonetheless.  I have asked people at Jimmy Buffett concerts to use the bathroom in their RVs, but have never barged into a complete stranger’s house to pee.

I know if you are still reading this, you are not remotely interested in where I am leaving urine samples, so on to the photos (don’t be offended, some of them may be of the naked people coming dangerously close to touching me):

Yep, those are real iPhones and an iPad... good thing she has a Sugar Daddy
Love the mask. Oh, was that not what I was supposed to notice?

Howard Livingston, who must have been really sick of singing Living on Key West Time by the end of this thing
Ok, whatever, dude.
Really tall guy next to really short tourist
Bob wearing my wig. Im going out on a limb and saying it looked a little better on me.